http://www.drunkduck.com/Plastic/

I'd really like to hear anyones thoughts, or suggestions on the art of my comic.
If you can suggest on the story as well, be my guest. ;)


Feel free to be as harsh as you want, as a former comic critique I know most are just trying to help.

Eh? No one's critiqued? Hmm...Ok well since you now have more then two pages up, I guess I will respond to your request! Alright! OH! And feel free to critique mine as pay back :)

OK. It's got an almost "sketchy" quality to it that makes it really appealing and fills the page. It's quite alive! Your characters deffinately show their "character" I'll put it this way. If all I did was read it I could tell who was who as well as if all I did was look at the art. It's clear and direct. The plot isn't thick but that's because it's still at the beginning and and you're "setting the stage".

There is only ONE thing that I can't help but notice. The "skinnyness" I have to admit that it is part of your comics charm however...erm...it's almost too skinny...and that's about it...heh.

(HERE'S WHERE I GO FANGIRL!):

...I LOVE LAYLA!!!!!!!!!! don't care if she's B!tchy...and how you drew the sister Lynn...oh-mah-gawd! Shmexy!!!!! >.< tee hee..

I like your style. It's nice. The skinniness is kind of "Code Geass"-esque. Anorexia aside, very good. I do see that you have some problem with hips and legs, though. Your word ballooning reminds me of "official" mangas, too... although at one point your incidental text gets so small I couldn't read it. That was frustrating.

Excellent glare of death. :-)

Does this ever get past the "rated" content it already has? If not, then I'll show it to my 12 year old. THERE'S the test of immortality right there. ;-)

@terryterrier
I'm glad Layla has a fan! ^^ She's probly more 'developed' than the other characters so far too. yeah slow plot is slooow, It'll heat up near the end of this chapter. (with standard sexual tension etc.)
Yeah I'll give them some curves...

@spearcarrier
Yeah, lower bodys are not my strength... I have been practicing tho so hopefully that will inprove.
I find it funny you'd mention the rating, as i have many times wanted to up it to M, even A.
I plan to keep it T+...but your 12 year old is ok with yuri?! AWESOME! :0

already said some stuff on yer pages, but i figured i'd leave ya somethin here since this is how i found it.

i realy dont read a lot of stories like this, so i cant comment on that neccisaily. but i think you have a lot of good, dynamic shots and i kinda like the skinny touch to it. hell, not many girls that age that have huge birth giving hips and tits at that age anyways. it's a nice cartoonyness. appropriate. ha, might be cool to see some big ole chubby chicks though.hahaha. and the story has a nice flow to it. goes farther pretty much every page and doesnt get stuck on filler.yer off to a good start.

nevermind what i had written in this part. misunderstood some stuff.

bbllaagghhh, anyways, nice comic.

+ PROS
#The html layout is really cute. The colors are nice.

# I think people will really enjoy the sketchy quality.

#The body language you do have is very subtle. It's nice.

#In your later pages i see youve added more pattern. Keep that up I think you need more 'visual interest' instead of just solid tones.

#The sound effects and varied fonts really make an impression.

-CONS

# Sometimes youre proportions look funny. You should look at real pictures of people, i think that will help and give you a variety of poses as well. Sometimes you lack interesting figures.

# I'm not sure why but the art looks a little blurry.

OVERALL I can tell you can write and draw, but it's obvious that you're new at putting them together. Your comic just need more professionalism. It's not as clean or neat as it should be. Take more time on it. Use smoother, varied size pens. (keep an 01 and 05 around)

actualy im gonna have to come back and agree with mishi a little bit more. i like the skinnyness, but it is too twig like in proportion to the rest of the body. study up a bit more,eh?

Ive been reading Plastic its really good. I cant remember if I ever left any comments.

Thanks yet again everyone!
I've been studying up on anatomy(slowly), making quick sketches from fitness mags and such, and I think the proportions are improving somewhat! :3

I'll be keeping the skinnyness though...just less 'twig-like' as you say.

If anyone else has new advice i'd be more than happy to receive it,
(I'm hoping more for the story too, for those that read it)

I really like your drawing style, it's very eye-appealing. I would suggest refrain from saving in JPG since it lowers the quality of your images and smudges everything. To keep your comic crisp and clear, save everything in PNG - you'll see a BIG difference!

I've noticed that you hide the hands of your characters often, I have a hard time with drawing hands as well and I try to draw them as often as I can. Examine your own hands, go on a stock picture site take some time to really practice drawing hands and fingers -- you'll see, it will really pay off in the end.

Hands are what brings characters to life.

Keep drawing, you have a lot of talent!!! :)

~Audrey

@nightfable

Actually I have a personal reason for not saving in .png
I'm on dail-up and i usually skip past comics that have large file sizes in .png
It's a REALLY long load time. But who knows maybe it would be better...

I didn't even notice the hands though, XD

Thanks you for your suggestions and encouragement!

Skullbie
Thanks yet again everyone!
I've been studying up on anatomy(slowly), making quick sketches from fitness mags and such, and I think the proportions are improving somewhat! :3

I'll be keeping the skinnyness though...just less 'twig-like' as you say.

If anyone else has new advice i'd be more than happy to receive it,
(I'm hoping more for the story too, for those that read it)

I can definitely tell youve got in some extra practice lately your stuff improves drastically from page to page.

I think you have a very fine comic and I don't think I can expound on anything that hasn't been suggested already. I think the writing is the main appeal here, and you do have some fine, occasionally inconsistent art.

albone
I think you have a very fine comic and I don't think I can expound on anything that hasn't been suggested already. I think the writing is the main appeal here, and you do have some fine, occasionally inconsistent art.

Yeah The art should settle now...gotta find what works right! :)

@Warpedwenger
Thanks pal!

I love it. The art has a very dark/horro tone to it, but somehow it just fits. I like the chibi versions of the characters too. The only thing I could suggest as far as art goes, is to check you're proportions every once in a while. I noticed that sometimes the character's head is a bit big for their body. A trick I learned is to look at it from a distance. Other than that keep up the good work.

Head size is easy in manga since the standard is to map out the body by head lengths. A realistic human figure is 8 heads high. I draw at 5 for my comic because its humorous. However many heads you decide is right make a guide to show where everything is and your characters will always be proportioned properly. (If you do it right... I dont always follow my own advice.)

@Rusty Knight
You're the first to mention the having a dark tone to it, I found that interesting. And yes I will continue to work on proportions! Thanks!

@Warpy(j/k,)
I have heard about that head guide quite a few times, i don't use it in truth, but maybe someday. Thanks! :3

Why do I haiku?
Mindlessly chanting words
Accomplishments sense

Everyone puts 5
What are you worried about?
You are successful

Pros:
Art is fantastic
Good twist throughout the comic
Keeps people engaged

Facial expressions
Do you go to some art class?
Inclined to think so

Teeny Weeny Cons:

Cheesy lines kills story
Don't overuse the word "Whore"
Di di da da

Characters all bone
They are anorexic
You need more Mc Donalds
____________________________________________________________________________________
We all read plastic
Burining our CFC's
Wait, what the heck happenned?

(P.S How on earth do I add my profile and about me section. I've been chipping at it for eternity now and it is seriously driving me crazy. )

Profile cant be reached
My futile efforts, dismay
Driving me insane

By your friend and fan
Who worships your comic
Have a good night