I just posted my new manga... and well -title pretty much explains it- please comment and view. I like critiquage but please include at least one positive thing in your critique because all negative isn't good. (so please have good points and bad ones) Thankyou.
(please tell me if i posted this wrong or something i am new)
<3
:3

Ok, first off, the ENTIRE point of Critiques are to get some negative feedback. If you get only positive feedback its only an ego boost, and your comic won't improve in the slightest. Nothing is worse than an artist that can't admit their downfalls. nothing.

With that said, I will check it out and tell ya what I think.

~NLTC

notlikelytocare
Ok, first off, the ENTIRE point of Critiques are to get some negative feedback. If you get only positive feedback its only an ego boost, and your comic won't improve in the slightest. Nothing is worse than an artist that can't admit their downfalls. nothing.

With that said, I will check it out and tell ya what I think.

~NLTC

no no i meant to have positive AND negative ok?

Well, It shows promise, and is a very cutesy story, but the art could use a little cleaning up. Have you ever thought about making a draft page, and then making a final production with smoother shading?

Also, don't be afraid to edit this with Photoshop, etc. The panels could be drawn with a ruler, and text typed instead of written. Simply spending an hour or so more on each page could improve this comic DRAMATICALLY.

Overall, I give this comic a 6 out of 10, I'll keep an eye on it to see if it improves any.

Hope this helps!

~NLTC

notlikelytocare
Well, It shows promise, and is a very cutesy story, but the art could use a little cleaning up. Have you ever thought about making a draft page, and then making a final production with smoother shading?

Also, don't be afraid to edit this with Photoshop, etc. The panels could be drawn with a ruler, and text typed instead of written. Simply spending an hour or so more on each page could improve this comic DRAMATICALLY.

Overall, I give this comic a 6 out of 10, I'll keep an eye on it to see if it improves any.

Hope this helps!

~NLTC

Thankyou so much i will!
<3
-is happy that had a positive tone-
:D

*grins* Very cute story, with all those little hints of something deeper. It has ex-ce-lent potential, but just a couple things:

Your story moves along rather quickly. I personally think that you could spend a little more time on buildup, as well as throwing in some of the DRAMA!! element. Also, I agree with notlikelytocare, your art does need to be cleaned up a bit. You could try inking it, whether on the computer or before you scan, but it's always good to have nice, clean lines. Also, whether handwritten or typed, your text is a little small.

And, of course, study styles and techniques from your favorite manga. Keep going and keep drawing!

okamimako
*grins* Very cute story, with all those little hints of something deeper. It has ex-ce-lent potential, but just a couple things:

Your story moves along rather quickly. I personally think that you could spend a little more time on buildup, as well as throwing in some of the DRAMA!! element. Also, I agree with notlikelytocare, your art does need to be cleaned up a bit. You could try inking it, whether on the computer or before you scan, but it's always good to have nice, clean lines. Also, whether handwritten or typed, your text is a little small.

And, of course, study styles and techniques from your favorite manga. Keep going and keep drawing!

thankyou!
:D

It is a cute looking comic. I would recommend using a ruler to make your panels, so that the lines are straight, and possibly getting some more background detail in there so that your character stick out more.

Providing links to your comic in the thread post also may help people to visit the page and review / crit it for you. ;)

The crazy thing about this is how much your drawing style resembles how I used to draw when I first started doing webcomics...You wouldn't happen to be a Megatokyo fan? It has a 'Megatokyo' influenced look to the artwork.

Aaanyway, I'm not going to tell you anything bad. I'm going to tell you things you could try experimenting with to improve. You can choose to listen to my advice or not to. A useful thing to learn as an artist is that sometimes you should listen to critics, but sometimes you should trust your own feelings.
On the good side, you understand how to tell a story with pictures. So many comics fall down because the artist can draw lots of lovely images cascading down a page, but forgets to make it clear to show the reader what's going on. Your panels are generally quite clear about the sequence of events they're showing. Well done, have a cookie.

You could probably take this further and improve it by keeping this strong 'storytelling with pictures' thing and using your layout to give it a little more punch. So, here are some things you can try out:
-Guttering: Right now, you're using lines to separate panels. That's okay, and it's not making things hard to read, but if you want the comic to look a bit more finished and professional, make clean white borders between your panels of about 3-4mm. This makes the page look sharper and the jumps between the panels clearer.
-'Popping': At the moment, you're going the safe road and keeping things inside your borders. Again, not a bad thing, but have you ever tried making the contents of a panel 'pop' outside the panel borders? Give it a go sometime, it can really make layouts sparkle when used to emphasise a dramatic moment!
-CG speech bubbles. You don't HAVE to do this. There are some great comics that write text by hand on Drunkduck, like 'Wolf' and 'Fated Feather'. Your writing is perfectly legible, so you don't have to if you don't want to...but printed text can look neater, so it's worth thinking about, even if you decide you want to leave your text as-is.
-Angles and distances. Okay, you're mostly keeping in your comfort zone with lots of middle distance front view head-mid shots. To make pages look more exciting, try varying the distance more. Throw in some close-ups on faces for emotional impact, or some long-zoomed-out shots to show characters in relation to the world around them.

On the art side of things there's just one thing I'm going to say you should concentrate on, and that's anatomy. There's barely an artist in the world who can draw perfect anatomy, so don't feel down. the area you should focus on for now is improving how you draw hands and arms, and how you visualise the body in 3d space. This will help you to do diverse and interesting poses like a pro! ^_^

You're off to a good start. You have a good eye for character design (those costumes in particular are very well-designed), and you're good at visual narrative. I think I'll keep an eye on your comic and offer advice when needed if you don't mind me doing that? You can feel free to ask me how to do anything you want to know either on here or by private message (I like giving advice and tutorials, so I won't mind at all).

Ganbatte!