Heya, this is a poem I wrote as an introduction to the story that eventually became our comic. I wanted to keep the ten-syllable-per-line meter except in one intentional break. So tell me what yall think, would it work as an enticement into a fantasy story?



Eternal Eve spins the yarn of the Weave.
Every life from there does design receive.
The teeming threads converge, merge, radiate,
and align to allow and animate
the Purpose Paradigm, the end of time.
But at prime junctures the web is punctured,
nature of their kernels sharing one trait
thus to us revealed:
positioned to pave the way to Dream Gate,
they are the picture of final structure.


There's more, but only if you want it.

It's a little confusing, but that might work in your favour, since people may want to read on to try to understand :)

Yes, I suppose it is. That was the intention - it is a prophecy that needs to be decoded by those (characters in the comic) to whom it pertains... So it is a little dense and it references stuff from the setting. But, I am also curious whether the form is appealing - whether it sounds good, you know, how it rolls of the tongue...

here's some more (heh, it only took one response for me to post more)

Both the Tree of Deaths and the Tree of Dreams
stand solemn in Weave’s eversurging streams:
first Aeons, emanating, emerging,
opposite and objective and urging.
From them stem very threads that beget them
in order to ascend to source and end
and for once they proclaim in unison:
That One is the Judge.
The razorblade that now prays on your son.
The end brought on by an impartial hand.