So this is the first page to a comic i plan on putting up here some time. (Obviously you could get that from the Title) The original art for this is over a year old and it was so poorly inked i couldnt put it up so i redrew over all of it with a sharpy making it much prettier and it looks almost as good as i currently draw. The first 20 pages are already drawn out so they will be about equal or maybe a little worse quality than this one, but after that they should pick up.

So tell me what you think of the first page plz. I probably wont submit it to DrunkDuck until (if) i get the first 20 pages ive already drawn inked and ready.



PS. i dont have a title for it yet... sadly... cant think of a good one... lol

howabout... 'cliche'...

Puff_Of_Smoke
howabout... 'cliche'...

I'm not sure how you could pull enough information at all from that one picture to call it 'cliche'.

The page looks fine in my opinion.

If you're going to create a title, and you have a storyline set out before you, then try taking something from the story to represent it. A place, person, etc..

PLOT-
What happens when you die, do you go to heaven, hell, do these after-worlds really exist. What happens when you go to the place you thought was heaven and find it corrupted, destroyed, the very thing you thought would be salvation only wishes to consume you. You are in a constant state of fear as everything and everyone wants the very energy that is keeping you substained and you cant remember your past so you often wonder if you truly should preserve yourself. Awakened alone, not knowing who you are, why your here, thrown into a world full of destruction, and pain this is one important persons story as he travels through the land of the dead and learns of its many strange and unheard of powers.

Well im gonna have the basic plot in the front (i hate reading a comic not knowing what i could be getting into, reading up to page 100 and finally finding out the plot and not liking it)
The plot makes it sound not to unique but i have some very cool concepts and ideas that will keep it running and hopefully entertaining.

WARNING

Please don't start off doing a 100 page epic. Unless you have done lots of writing before, it is going to be a mess. Do short 5 page stories. They will be far cooler, and you can do lots more in terms of ideas and cram as much in as possible. This is what the pros do to cut their teeth and what you should really look to do and not enough people do anyway on the web.

It will also mean you will probably get more fans quickly.

The art looks pretty good, though you will probably improve quickly.

That looks pretty cool. Hope you put it up. It's also interesting to see another writer/artist who has a bunch of buffer pages for their comic. The old stuff looks passable, but you can't wait to get to the stuff that looks good.

Yah my biggest problem is when i try to write short stories... they always turn into these huge epic things that are 100 pages long... Its like humanly impossible for me to write anything short... im to into these big complicated and deep stories...

If you can't do anything but large stories, serialize it. Break it up into smaller more digestible chunks of comic nutrition.

HAM

Puff_Of_Smoke
howabout... 'cliche'...

I'm not sure how you could pull enough information at all from that one picture to call it 'cliche'.

The page looks fine in my opinion.

If you're going to create a title, and you have a storyline set out before you, then try taking something from the story to represent it. A place, person, etc..

not sure how I could pull enough information to call it cliche?

anylize the comic page and the entire post word by word. compare it to the stereotypical comics. there you go.

actually the process would take a 18-19 sentenced paragraph to explain... but I'm lazy. in other words, I'm generic.

DemonSaintDante
PLOT-
What happens when you die, do you go to heaven, hell, do these after-worlds really exist. What happens when you go to the place you thought was heaven and find it corrupted, destroyed, the very thing you thought would be salvation only wishes to consume you. You are in a constant state of fear as everything and everyone wants the very energy that is keeping you substained and you cant remember your past so you often wonder if you truly should preserve yourself. Awakened alone, not knowing who you are, why your here, thrown into a world full of destruction, and pain this is one important persons story as he travels through the land of the dead and learns of its many strange and unheard of powers.

Well im gonna have the basic plot in the front (i hate reading a comic not knowing what i could be getting into, reading up to page 100 and finally finding out the plot and not liking it)
The plot makes it sound not to unique but i have some very cool concepts and ideas that will keep it running and hopefully entertaining.

Welcome to the matrix.

No, fo' rizzle, this is off the heazy, dawg!

Looks awesome, you should definitly submit it.

And how can you tell it's cliche`?

therealtj

DemonSaintDante
PLOT-
What happens when you die, do you go to heaven, hell, do these after-worlds really exist. What happens when you go to the place you thought was heaven and find it corrupted, destroyed, the very thing you thought would be salvation only wishes to consume you. You are in a constant state of fear as everything and everyone wants the very energy that is keeping you substained and you cant remember your past so you often wonder if you truly should preserve yourself. Awakened alone, not knowing who you are, why your here, thrown into a world full of destruction, and pain this is one important persons story as he travels through the land of the dead and learns of its many strange and unheard of powers.

Well im gonna have the basic plot in the front (i hate reading a comic not knowing what i could be getting into, reading up to page 100 and finally finding out the plot and not liking it)
The plot makes it sound not to unique but i have some very cool concepts and ideas that will keep it running and hopefully entertaining.

Welcome to the matrix.

No, fo' rizzle, this is off the heazy, dawg!

Looks awesome, you should definitly submit it.

And how can you tell it's cliche`?

many, MANY reasons.

Puff_of_Smoke: i appreciate your comment but if you find my peice cliche and you have some form of critism can you please elaberate on what you do not like about what i have currently submitted. I dont mind people talking bad about my work as long as they can tell me what i need to change to make it better.

Thank you every one else for your positive feed back and advice...

Currently i have 2 pages completed (including the above one) another fully inked and just needs to be cleaned up on the computer. And one more which is about half way inked. So its moving along quickly and once i get the first twenty pages done ill submit the first 15... and then start on a weekly schedule.

This like my million other comic book ideas has been a long time in the making and has been redone many times... hopefully i can pull through with this one...

DemonSaintDante
Puff_of_Smoke: i appreciate your comment but if you find my peice cliche and you have some form of critism can you please elaberate on what you do not like about what i have currently submitted. I dont mind people talking bad about my work as long as they can tell me what i need to change to make it better.

...it's a good cliche not a bad one.

So... it's a convention. Is that what you're trying to describe? Conventions are fine. It lets you build on some type of idea or story that's already been established but you can then take it and make it your own.

Yah cliche usually means a negative thing... there are better words to use, thats why i took it as a negative thing... Well ive inked a few more pages... currently doing page 6... got new pretty sharpies from my mommy and daddy... so inking wont take an entire day any more... woo

Inking suggestion: Ever get the itch to try brushes and ink? I know my teachers have suggested that to me so often that I finally broke down and started using them recently.

Title suggestion: Keep it simple, howbout something like "Life After Death" ... hooks into your central theme.

Story suggestion: Even if you have a 100 page epic ... break into smaller, managable chapters. Gives you something to shoot for as the artist. Completing the first 10 page chapter is something you can focus on and get to rather quickly. Then another chapter. And another. And another. Before you know it, the 100 page epic doesn't seem so daunting.

Anyways, good luck with your stuff. Hope you post it soon.

yah i figured i would do 20 page chapters or so... i just finished page 7... i figured tuesday i would put the first ten pages up... then update every tuesday and thursday after that...

Ive never used just ink and brush but ive seen these things called sakura pigment brush pens which look bueatiful and work just like a brush... i want them so bad...

Just thought i should mention that i put it up

http://www.drunkduck.com/Bible/

10 new pages will be up tomorrow

Looks awesome.

GRRR i cant get the thumbnail to work... its really bothering me and I am not sure why its not working. Dont suppose anybody that is reading this had advice...

Thumbnails are broken at the moment. The admins are still looking into this.

We are increasing in number, our army will be huge and our arrows will black out the sun!!!

oh... thank you... and here i was about to throw my computer across the room... glad to know its not something i am doing wrong. I hope it will be fixed soon.

It is fixed now =D

Yep i noticed when i had a pretty new picture in place of that weird black line ... thanks for the help.