TheFlyingGreenMonkey
The first four lines are really good.
The first four practically wrote themselves. It was the fifth line that was a pill.
At first I thought of the line, "the world belongs to me" which sounds a whole lot better but I already used the word "me" and I didn't want the poem to sound that self centered. I tried experimenting with the word "we" but couldn't find a good line. Eventually I decided upon "see" and although the fifth line does break the flow of the poem a bit, I found it to be adequate enough.



Adopted on 11-15-10
