FOODink

Rambunctious characters know as the Inkers who have all the free time on their hands. Causing trouble in the comic world is just what they do. Dumands-Daniel, Spear, Alice, Munela, Jeremy and their comic artist OOZy along with their cat Neelhtak. Enjoying the day as much as they can through short adventures and jokes while them become closer friends.

Foodink review


First impressions were very bad with a load of bad filler before the comic began, well mostly bad, there is one good example of fan art.

Writing.
I think this is supposed to be a gag comic but there are no gags. There is nothing to keep people reading on any level. I didn't laugh once, nor smirk or even groan with a bad joke.
This one almost made me smirk, I felt a slight tug of the lip.
http://www.drunkduck.com/FOODink/index.php?p=765252
The author considers it bad and follows it with this
http://www.drunkduck.com/FOODink/index.php?p=765257
which is funny for unintended reasons, surely to run out of ideas you need to have some to begin with.
Damn that's harsh but true.
This strip is n example of while not funny the author can create something that people can relate to.http://www.drunkduck.com/FOODink/index.php?p=778797
Sort of like this http://www.drunkduck.com/FOODink/index.php?p=782971
I didn't really like either but they did more than the others and someone out there may get something from them. it seems to be improving a little but even amongst the newer ones there are some that take the standard even lower.


Art
Very simple line art and garish colouring are the order of the day. there is NOTHING appealing visually. In fact there is little good I can say about the art except that it is consistent.
Okay that is a little harsh as there are a few examples of shading here and there that are okayish and it look as though it is done in MS paint with a mouse which makes it hard to make stuff look good.
The mouse drawn speech bubbles look terrible and the text again looks awful.
There is little difference in quality between old and new pages except the most recent updates where the author has appears to have started vectorizing the art.
It's only a small improvement but it is an improvement.
One of the better looking strips.
http://www.drunkduck.com/FOODink/index.php?p=767330
The bast part of the art is the expressions, which are sometimes effective.
Also the backdrop to this one is interesting.
http://comics.drunkduck.com/FOODink/pages/ec66e3fe8fddf078908a78a19e5bac28.jpg


Overall
I don't get it, well I don't actually think there is anything to get. It seems as though the author wants to make something but has no idea what so creates anything.
The weak visuals could easily be forgiven if there were funny or interesting gags but this comic has nothing going for it. The author is always mentioning a lack of ideas but he or she isn't there aren't any on display.
I'm sorry that this is a harsh review, but it left me cold in every way. I didn't even feel enough to hate it.
I'm clearly not the target audience though and the cute aspect of some of the later pges may appeal to someone somewhere. Don't let this get you down though just keep trying to improve.

ART: Looks too much like doodles made in a minute or two. VERY unappealing and would work better in a comic strip format. It would help a lot to study from an anatomy book, or even one of those "how-to" manga books one can find easily in any bookstore. Definite room for improvement.

WRITING: So far I found at least one page that was chuckle-worthy, but the rest just seem like inner thoughts of the artist about these characters who look too similiar to each other. Most of the dialogue comes off as quaint and cute, though. Not much of a fan of random gags.

Overall, it can use much improvement and it looks like the artists is capable of it with a little more effort. Perhaps putting in some background into more of the pages would help as well.

I feel like I'm going to have a hard time reviewing this comic by splitting it into parts, it's the kind of thing that creates such an overwhelming feeling in the reader as you go along that you have to take it as a whole (art, writing, and general theme) or else you won't get the full effect of the comic.
I'll start by saying that it gave me an overwhelming feeling of high school silliness. This isn't a bad thing, really, but I feel like the creator is trying too hard to fit into that Mass-Marketed Hot Topic Sceenster tshirt humor niche. Both the writing (mostly non sequiturs or just plain random musings on things ) and the art remind me of something I'd see on a tshirt being sported by a 15 year old in the mall.

That said, here we go:

Writing: Like Genejoke said, FOODink feels like a gag-less gag comic. I notice a lot of playing off of age old tropes like the light bulb joke and the tried and true zany sunday-morning-comic character types... but then half way through, the comic takes a turn for the Japanese-y with the introduction of Alicewho is pretty goddamned moe and a random appearance by Light Yagami. I feel like the art reads too western cutesy to carry anime/japanese tropes, but that's just my opinion.

Like I said before, the "humor" mostly consists of non sequiturs and random musings rather than actual jokes. Some of them are cute and some of them made me chuckle, but I think the target audience, (which at age 19 I think I've just grown out of) will probably think they're hilarious. It's really not my thing, but at age 16 I would have thought a lot of these were much funnier than I feel like they are now.

My biggest problem with the writing is how the author keeps saying he has "no ideas" or thinks such and such page is bad. DON'T DO THAT. IT'S MORE ANNOYING THAN ANYTHING ELSE IN THE ENTIRE COMIC. If you don't update for a while and don't have any ideas.... don't write that in the comments or make multiple comics about it, please. Most of us here are comic artists/writers and understand... making a huge deal about it seems amateurish. ) :

Art: Cutesy. From the way the characters are dressed, especially Alice, and the NEON COLORS used, I get the impression the author is trying to force himself to draw to the Sceenster niche. This is cool and I actually really like some of the clothing designs (Alice looks really cute here ) but I get the impression from checking out the author's dA page that he tends to rush the art in these comic pages and/or he's sacrificing quality to fit in a certain style. I'd really LOVE to see the author draw a comic page in this style! This is so cute and unique looking, all the while using much less garish colors and looking more visually pleasing than most of the pages. I think the messy line art suits his style so much more, it reminds me of a french fashion drawing. If the comic was in this style I'd fave it.

The art has definitely improved since the comic started. If the author had drawn the legs in all of the panels of this page I'd say it was the most visually pleasing and the most successful. The weird tie-dye looking patterns on the superhero outfits are pretty cool.

Finally, I noticed a lot of the comic pages, like the one I just linked above and the "Twinkle Twinkle" comic seem to have the characters slanting towards the side as you get to the last panel. This is an easy fix, you can usually isolate the offending characters/panels and rotate them slightly in the other direction, or jut pay closer attention when you're drawing them by using a ruler or another straight edge to draw a center line to balance them.

Overall Impression: I get the feeling that the author is trying to appeal to a very specific group and is thus limiting himself. If he broke out and did some more refined work I think the comic would improve greatly. I feel like he doesn't know exactly what direction to go in right now but I can tell he really does care about his characters... maybe he can use this "gag" comic to test the waters and do a more serious story with them.

The over all tone of this review may sound negative, but I think if you committed yourself to improving and thought outside the box a bit more, you'd be able to do a lot more than this comic gives you credit for. I see a lot of myself when I was first starting out in this comic and I'm just trying to give some advice that I could have used back in the day.

Keep working on it!

Thanks for the review.
I liked the review a lot better than the first two, of course me being the creator I don't like too much negative comments.
First, I'm a girl :3

Second, please note the comic creator in the COMIC, is a character :3 Based off me, yes, but none the less... her own character.

Third, the comic you says looks rushed, untrue, I work to make the comic for a good 6 or so minutes, maybe longer depending. I then take almost an hour on colour.fix line, fliter, coding, texting. :>

I'm very glad you like the other style I drew, but please know... that style is meant for a full live pages strip NOT a cartoon strip. :>

Someone
Third, the comic you says looks rushed, untrue, I work to make the comic for a good 6 or so minutes, maybe longer depending. I then take almost an hour on colour.fix line, fliter, coding, texting. :>

You should make a comic of that joke.

oozsinfered
Thanks for the review.
I liked the review a lot better than the first two, of course me being the creator I don't like too much negative comments.
First, I'm a girl :3

As I was typing "he" I was thinking to myself "I guarantee she's a girl." Sorry about that, I'm terrible at telling genders! >>

Second, please note the comic creator in the COMIC, is a character :3 Based off me, yes, but none the less... her own character.

Oh yeah? Which one? O:

Third, the comic you says looks rushed, untrue, I work to make the comic for a good 6 or so minutes, maybe longer depending. I then take almost an hour on colour.fix line, fliter, coding, texting. :>

I'm not sure if I called any one strip rushed (if I did that's not what I meant!) but I meant the over all quality of all of the strips. Plus... 6 or so minutes of drawing and an hour of editing is... pretty rushed. D: Maybe work on adding more props and backgrounds? That won't take much longer and will fill out the space more.

I'm very glad you like the other style I drew, but please know... that style is meant for a full live pages strip NOT a cartoon strip. :>

Have you done any "full live pages strip(s?)" I'd like to see them.

Dodger
Oh yeah? Which one? O:

Well, if you don't know then why did you state I made comics about the creator not having ideas, so you must know who the "creator" in the comic is. Just so you know, I sugest you read the comic again and find the page with the person saying "I have no new comic ideas" that is the creator, which is clear considering THEY are making the comic and stating they have no ideas.

Have you done any "full live pages strip(s?)" I'd like to see them.

No why would I, it's not my style. It's hard to do, the anatomy would be horrible because of the drawing. I enjoy my cartoon style.

I'm not sure if I called any one strip rushed (if I did that's not what I meant!) but I meant the over all quality of all of the strips. Plus... 6 or so minutes of drawing and an hour of editing is... pretty rushed. D: Maybe work on adding more props and backgrounds? That won't take much longer and will fill out the space more.

That is not rushed considering the drawing on paper is only 6 minutes and then reline+drawing and such better on computer takes a long time, when you think about it... around an hour and a half for three panel to 6 panel comic... is a lot if it's just cartoon.

Genejoke

Someone
Third, the comic you says looks rushed, untrue, I work to make the comic for a good 6 or so minutes, maybe longer depending. I then take almost an hour on colour.fix line, fliter, coding, texting. :>

You should make a comic of that joke.

Why? That isn't even a joke, nor is funny. You may not have laughed at any of my comic pages, but I do have a sense of humour, which isn't to your liking. Why would I make a gag on my editing process which takes a lot of time for me from the begining comics did. The starting comics took around 15 minutes, the newer ones take hour and a half around, a lot of time for short panel cartoon comics

Someone
Why? That isn't even a joke, nor is funny.

It is now.




I know that isn't what you meant though. But six minutes drawing it is a large part of the problem, that is the chassis of the whole thing, work harder on that and make it look good before you even think about colouring and lettering.

oozsinfered
Well, if you don't know then why did you state I made comics about the creator not having ideas, so you must know who the "creator" in the comic is. Just so you know, I sugest you read the comic again and find the page with the person saying "I have no new comic ideas" that is the creator, which is clear considering THEY are making the comic and stating they have no ideas.

It's not as obvious as you think.

A lot of comics have a character who breaks the fourth wall and speaks for the creator as a joke. I assumed that was the situation since this is a comic strip.

No why would I, it's not my style. It's hard to do, the anatomy would be horrible because of the drawing. I enjoy my cartoon style.

Just wanted to know since you said that it was meant for that purpose. If you're not planning on using it beyond that one picture you could have just told me. : )

Genejoke

Someone
Why? That isn't even a joke, nor is funny.

It is now.




I know that isn't what you meant though. But six minutes drawing it is a large part of the problem, that is the chassis of the whole thing, work harder on that and make it look good before you even think about colouring and lettering.

No, it took me years to perfect a fast pace GOOD comic. The older ones took longer because well, I wasn't used to it. Saying I should take longer to do something I do fast, good and well is like saying that the creator of Calvin and Hobbes should have taken longer time drawing his characters, and with him, it took seconds.

Plus there's more to drawing, colouring and texting in comic work, just because you have shown me that fast paced comic that clearly looks bad, doesn't prove anything. It simply states how much of a good artist I am, considering mine take 6 minutes to draw out, then full hour and perhaps even longer sometimes to edit and set up. Don't ever compare such a horrible drawn and edited thing to my art, it is nothing like it.

I assume the comic and the oozsinfered profile are all a joke, much like Harkovasts plural bonerage comic.

Genejoke
I assume the comic and the oozsinfered profile are all a joke, much like Harkovasts plural bonerage comic.

Don't assume you make an Ass out of you and me.

No, I take my comics very seriously. After having worked on my style (from then till now at least) for almost 7 years. I take my comic serious. Including my profile, though I wouldn't understand why my profile would even be "a joke"

If you take your comic seriously try paying attention to the critiques given, you asked for them after all.

I suggested you take longer as your comic looks terrible and more time and effort might make an improvement.

Genejoke
If you take your comic seriously try paying attention to the critiques given, you asked for them after all.

I suggested you take longer as your comic looks terrible and more time and effort might make an improvement.

I do pay attention to them, if I didn't want to I would have never asked for a critique.
My comic does not look terrible. I put ENOUGH time and effort into making my comics, you are not me you do not know the painful work I had to do to make my comics. Years of studying, styling, perfecting. Plus my editing is way off the scale when it comes to strip comics, which normally take up to 20 minutes for people to edit.

oozsinfered
I do pay attention to them, if I didn't want to I would have never asked for a critique.
My comic does not look terrible. I put ENOUGH time and effort into making my comics, you are not me you do not know the painful work I had to do to make my comics. Years of studying, styling, perfecting. Plus my editing is way off the scale when it comes to strip comics, which normally take up to 20 minutes for people to edit.

Your behavior in this thread pretty much proves that you didn't want critique. You wanted praise.
I'm really not sure if you know what a critique entails and how to deal with it... either way, you'd probably be better off posting here.

Second, no. Just stop. Every time you reply with a warped view of how long it should take to draw and edit a comic you just make yourself look worse. You keep saying you put more effort into your comics than some unnamed mass (who exactly are comparing yourself to and where did you get the information that it only takes them 20 minutes?) It's pretty insulting to your fellow comickers.

Please, if you take nothing else from this review, understand that getting defensive over a critique and making lofty claims on the internet aren't good habits. Sometimes getting a critique hurts, but if you want to improve and be seen as a competent author/artist you need to take it in stride.

Dodger

oozsinfered
I do pay attention to them, if I didn't want to I would have never asked for a critique.
My comic does not look terrible. I put ENOUGH time and effort into making my comics, you are not me you do not know the painful work I had to do to make my comics. Years of studying, styling, perfecting. Plus my editing is way off the scale when it comes to strip comics, which normally take up to 20 minutes for people to edit.

Your behavior in this thread pretty much proves that you didn't want critique. You wanted praise.
I'm really not sure if you know what a critique entails and how to deal with it... either way, you'd probably be better off posting here.

Second, no. Just stop. Every time you reply with a warped view of how long it should take to draw and edit a comic you just make yourself look worse. You keep saying you put more effort into your comics than some unnamed mass (who exactly are comparing yourself to and where did you get the information that it only takes them 20 minutes?) It's pretty insulting to your fellow comickers.

Please, if you take nothing else from this review, understand that getting defensive over a critique and making lofty claims on the internet aren't good habits. Sometimes getting a critique hurts, but if you want to improve and be seen as a competent author/artist you need to take it in stride.

Yes I know that, but even so, I don't like getting told I don't put enough effort in my comic, when I know I do. I'm sure you can understand that. Sorry for my behavior, but the user before should not have pulled that insult one me.

Might I remind you all this is for serious business.


Anyways.

comic : The comic seems like a gag comic, a strip comic and a word to the wise type thing. I honestly think the artist has shown this VERY well. I like how the comic can have it little gags and then, go off into a more romantic view or a simple view. As seen here http://www.drunkduck.com/FOODink/index.php?p=795984 , http://www.drunkduck.com/FOODink/index.php?p=792650 and http://www.drunkduck.com/FOODink/index.php?p=778797 I find this VERY effective. It makes sure the reader doesn't always assume what will happen next. In a gag comic, you always know, there will be a joke at the end and when there isn't... you are left disapointed. However, here because it seems to be a more realistic like thing with a mixture of themes I am always left going "I wonder what the next one will be about?"

Style and art: The style at the start is... iffy. Myself being a very picky person when it comes to lines and colouring found it hard to look at the the old pages because of the line art. Yet, the artist has clearly cleaned up a bit. The newer ones look smoother and I particularly enjoy the expressions. Some of my favorites are in these. http://www.drunkduck.com/FOODink/index.php?p=793627 http://www.drunkduck.com/FOODink/index.php?p=781723
and also of course http://www.drunkduck.com/FOODink/index.php?p=770312 I actually find the more and more I read in the more improvements I saw. For instance... from one of the firsts. http://www.drunkduck.com/FOODink/index.php?p=502182 to the newest (as of today) http://www.drunkduck.com/FOODink/index.php?p=799981 there is CLEARLY a difference and I like it. Though I do enjoyed the fact the other newer ones had no background of boxes. That seemed to work very well for me. It made me less distracted when reading the comic. Then again, having something in the background is very eyes catching. The colouring in many of the comics is done well. The superhero uniforms are great. http://www.drunkduck.com/FOODink/index.php?p=798909 and so are all the colour codes for each character. Some pages of course the text was bas, I think the way the artist has it now is fine and they shouldn't test out font sizes too much. This is the worse pages. http://www.drunkduck.com/FOODink/index.php?p=767330 http://www.drunkduck.com/FOODink/index.php?p=705397 The first one so far has to be the worst page I have seen.

CharacterSpeaking a of character. I think I'm going to be very obvious when I state They're trying to hit an age level, clearly. Mainly I believe their own age level. If someone who is say... ages from 13 to around 18, this comic would be perfect. Older ages perhaps not, depending on how they look at style. This isn't a total bad thing. In fact it's good. With characters that are more related toward teens, attract more teens. I think the relationship with the Dumands and Alice character is nice. It's not exactly stating they are a couple, but that Alice has strong feelings for Dumands and he finds it cute, but doesn't seem to push forward with it. That is shown here http://www.drunkduck.com/FOODink/index.php?p=786098 and then here http://www.drunkduck.com/FOODink/index.php?p=792650 I think also the fact that the redheaded boy Spear seems to be sort of distant. As in he's sort of the one in the group that says nothing. (I.E the "cool" character persona) When I looked at all the characters I saw what the personalities seemed to be showing. Each one has one basic characteristic of people. (I think anyways)

Story Rambunctious characters know as the Inkers who have all the free time on their hands. Causing trouble in the comic world is just what they do. Dumands-Daniel, Spear, Alice, Munela, Jeremy and their comic artist OOZy along with their cat Neelhtak. Enjoying the day as much as they can through short adventures and jokes while them become closer friends. I think this cute little comic has a nice story line. It isn't too indepth. I feel it should be more detailed out though. I'm sure though because this updating thing just started with the comic I expect the story line to come much more clearly. Like all comics, strips or pages, you have to start somewhere basic. That is clearly where you are, but... you seem to be going into somewhat of a small story. One starting here http://www.drunkduck.com/FOODink/index.php?p=798075 If the artist does this more and more the comic will be sure to take off better.


All in all, keep up the good work and keep on improving. I look forward to seeing more in my favorite box.

Wow, awesome review Uverwillow
good points