1) If I were to answer, I'd have to kill you.
2) See above.
3) No. He's super-straight. I realized one day that there was no one in the cast against gay rights (Fundie is against gays, but not lesbians, so doesn't count, and most of the rest doesn't really care...), so I decided, behind the scenes, that he was straight and proud of it.
4) Because he's a representation of a laddie who needs to be hit more often.
5) Because I can only make so many excuses to hit him.
6) Because this comic is, sadly, not popular. Cry.