| User: MrSynnerster | | 5 | | can't wait for next issue -Posted on Feb 08, 2010 | | User: oneGemini | | | Cool man. I thought there'd be a little more vengeance before this issue was done -- but next issue perhaps?
I know you're not the writer, but I should mention that there are commas that need to be put in to those last narration blocks;
"Oddly enough, before leaving, the woman notices Eclipse pick up a cellphone one of the thugs dropped.
With that, the helpful figure of eclipse disappears down the dark alley."
I should also mention that "helpful" is a term I'd associate with a more jovial image, there should be attention paid to adjectives picked in the future. IMHO it takes away from the impact of the sequence which is a bit more somber and mysterious. While he was being helpful, when looking at him, that's not the first thought that comes to mind - perhaps "imposing," or "powerful." Just a thought.
But onwards and upwards, eh? You've shown great improvement from page one to now -- so I can only imagine what the next issue will bring. :) -Posted on Feb 07, 2010 | | User: armandoB | | 5 | | nice -Posted on Feb 07, 2010 | | User: cyberdog | | | All you guys are amazing.
Fighting Stranger: Yeah that is hilarious! I should develop some kinda,"WarriorBorn Coffee Warmer." I could see someone using that wearing their "Official WarriorBorn pajamas." -Posted on Feb 06, 2010 | | User: xaxelx | | 5 | -Posted on Feb 05, 2010 | | User: thefightingstranger | | 5 | | I could have used the B.A.N.D.S. this morning. My coffee got cold way to fast and needed some heating up. -Posted on Feb 05, 2010 | | User: repoman | | 5 | | Great ending to the issue. Eclipse is back in business. -Posted on Feb 05, 2010 | | User: Walrus | | 5 | | Haven't been on in a while, huge improvement on your part. -Posted on Feb 05, 2010 | | User: machinehead | | 5 | | Awesome work I can't wait for the next issue! -Posted on Feb 05, 2010 | | User: dueeast | | 5 | | Great last page of this story. Good job! -Posted on Feb 05, 2010 | | User: CornBreadtm | | 5 | | :D Can't wait for the next issue! -Posted on Feb 05, 2010 | | User: Air Raid Robertson | | 5 | Those are nice effects for the flame in panel one.
I look forward to seeing you apply what you've learned to the next issue. -Posted on Feb 05, 2010 | | User: melsr007 | | 5 | | Cool Can't wait. -Posted on Feb 05, 2010 | | User: AzuJOD | | 5 | | Well done! -Posted on Feb 05, 2010 | | User: SlideStudios | | 5 | | nice work. I'll be looking out for the next issue. -Posted on Feb 05, 2010 | | User: Hero | | 5 | -Posted on Feb 05, 2010 | | User: Jules | | 5 | | Can't wait for the next issue, should be awesome. -Posted on Feb 05, 2010 | | User: freefall_drift | | 5 | | We all learn and improve our skill and craft if we keep at it. -Posted on Feb 05, 2010 | | User: cyberdog | | | | Thanks everyone for stickin' with me. The next issue will be even better. -Posted on Feb 05, 2010 | | User: legacyhero | | 5 | | A very enjoyable read! -Posted on Feb 05, 2010 | | User: meemjar | | 5 | Great ending Cyberdog.
Check out the recent two pages of Smorty Smythe.
Dr. Argon is back facing off with Smorty & co.
But not in a way you'd expect! -Posted on Feb 05, 2010 | | User: Peipei | | 5 | | Good ending :3 -Posted on Feb 05, 2010 | | User: DAJB | | 5 | Nice ending!
One small suggestion: you could have had the woman ask: "What - what are you doing?" and had Eclipse reply: "Cauterising the wound." That way you could have conveyed the same information to the reader, but without having to bring in the third-party narrator. (No big deal - just a suggestion!) -Posted on Feb 05, 2010 | | User: Brogan | | 5 | | Excellent ending C-dog. :) -Posted on Feb 05, 2010 |
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