trevoramueller

My Website VOTE for @$$hole! This is a conversation that I've been having lately, especially with the sequel to a certain "horror romance" movie coming out soon. Call me old fashion, but the only horror romance that I really want to see is Frankenstein. But I digress.... I had made comment on my twitter a while back about how "modern" vampires - these beautiful people that you see on TV and in movies that violate the rules of being a vampire - are not in fact vampires at all. They more closely resemble a chupacabra in description. "Goat drinkers," I call them. The truth is that over the years, especially recently, the rules the a vampire must follow have been becoming much more lax. Crosses don't work, garlic is a joke, and only in very rare cases (ie: Joss Wheddon) do they have to be invited to enter a dwelling. I remember when Vampires were also OCD and crossing flowing water was a lethal as a steak to the heart. But there are a few items that are, to me, a staple to defining a vampire's weaknesses: Holy water, must drink human blood...and sunlight. It's my understanding that Edward Cullen is immune to these items (at least in a lethal capacity). So then what's the down side to being a vampire? "Oh, I get all sparkly when I'm out in the sunlight?" Well, I have news for you son, you attend high school instead of college night classes. The worst thing that you have to deal with as an immortal 17 year old is that you have to live as a 17 year old for all eternity. Time to get emo about it and start a blog. But in truth, I'd be pretty upset about that too. I mean, at least if I were 18 I'd be able to date women legally and attend college classes to mix up my day. I'd still not be able to rent a car, though.... So I think this comic is appropriate for remembering some of the roots of this current Hollywood trend. So I present to you the Nosferatu. This, ladies and gents, is a vampire. Edward Cullen is not. -Posted on Nov 04, 2009

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User: trevoramueller
Brogan: I can't help it, I have to make fun of Twilight.... Druchii: Thanks for reading! kyupol: That would certainly be an interesting costume. If you do that, you will have to take pictures. Warpedwenger: I had to rant. In my twitter feed I made comment "If it meows like a cat, purs like a cat, and has a fluffy tail...then why the hell would you call it a duck?" khard12: I don't mind good looking vampires. "Interview with a Vampire" was a terrific movie. Vampire's can be charming and attractive. But they have to follow certain rules, and with the Twilight series the rules are being ignored completely. I'm just saying, you wouldn't call a robot "magical" so why would you call a sparkling goat drinker a vampire? -Posted on Nov 05, 2009

User: Brogan		5
XD -Posted on Nov 04, 2009

User: Druchii		5
-Posted on Nov 04, 2009

User: kyupol		5
Next halloween I'd dress up like a cop. And then I'd wear insect wings and put a straw in my mouth as an improvised proboscis. And don't forget the joker face. :) That's cool... its also a protest at the police at the same time. haha. -Posted on Nov 04, 2009

User: Warpedwenger		5
The strip was funny but the blog made it even better! -Posted on Nov 04, 2009

User: khard12		5
Whatever happened to the old, scary vampires? Bring those guys back and I might start watching vampire flicks again. -Posted on Nov 04, 2009

User: trevoramueller
amanda: That's okay, I only know it because I was writing a vampire movie with a friend back in college and we did a lot of research. Also used to play Vampire: The Masquerade table-top game. comic_chic: Thanks, glad you enjoy it. My reaction on Edward Cullen being a vampire is very similar to your reaction to White Queen and Silverfox being sisters in the Wolverine movie. gullas: Glad you dig it, buddy! Peipei: Thanks for reading! mattchee: Agreed. It's extremely watered down these days. I remember the X-Files episode that you mentioned. I wrote a similar scene, but with rice. Also, they had to untie shoelaces when entering houses and put them in a certain way. There were a bunch of little things that the vampire had to do. It was fun to write and research. -Posted on Nov 04, 2009

User: amanda		5
^.^ I'm not brushed up on my vampire lore or stories these days. Ah well. -Posted on Nov 04, 2009

User: comic_chic		5
lol, that's fab!! -Posted on Nov 04, 2009

User: gullas		5
lol! -Posted on Nov 04, 2009

User: Peipei		5
-Posted on Nov 04, 2009

User: mattchee		5
Agreed. While I dig the variety that's out there, I also think the recent crop has taken the Anne Rice angle a tad too far. On the OCD note, there was a clever X-Files where they were being attacked by a vampire and Mulder throws a bunch of sunflower seeds on the ground and the vampire goes "Aw, why'd you have to go and do that?!" and starts picking up the seeds obsessively. I forgot about that until now. -Posted on Nov 04, 2009